Do it scared

I’ve been listening to a lot of podcasts and reading a ton of books lately all about being yourself and overcoming the fear of moving forward in life. One of the things that kept coming up was that there will never be a perfect time to make your move, change your life or try something new. And beyond that, the fear never goes away, you just have to be courageous enough to do it scared.

I always understood what this meant in a cerebral way. It makes sense. There are things that will be scary to try and in order to branch out and do something new, you will likely be scared. But I suppose I always equated that with big huge life changes, not the small incremental steps toward a goal. I’ve just done a couple of those small steps and felt the fear.

I’ve begun my journey to learn to be a b3 instructor, a type of barre workout that is based in Toronto and all over the States. Going to the audition where I had to memorize choreography and perform it in the studio was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. And no matter how much I practiced, I would always be scared, because it’s new, outside my comfort zone and here’s the most important part – it mattered to me, greatly.

If something matters to you, and it lights you up, you are going to care a great deal about how it goes, and you will pour your heart and soul into it. That’s what I did with the barre audition. And then yesterday we had to have memorized a half hour’s worth of choreography, in order to teach it to the lead instructor at the studio. I was petrified! I had learned it as best I could, but it sure wasn’t perfect. and the reason I was so scared was because I am becoming an instructor to change my trajectory. I want to have more impact in this world. I want to do more good. I want to spread health and happiness to my fellow busy professional women, and help them to spend an hour focused on themselves. This MATTERS to me.

I think it you aren’t a little scared, you maybe aren’t pursuing your dreams as fiercely as you ought to be. And this is coming from someone who used to be uber-conservative. I did everything “right”. I never got in trouble, never stepped out of line, got my engineering degree and two Masters in order to work in the field that I grew up in – motorsport, and I got the job I had manifested. I did everything to plan.

To plan means on autopilot. And then everything fell apart – my family imploded, I began to question everything, and I realized I hadn’t looked up to see where I was headed in ten years. I ended up in a great job at the perfect company for working in motorsport, but I’d forgotten one key ingredient – what I actually wanted to feel and contribute to this world.

I haven’t felt scared in my day job for years because I got comfortable there. I’m great at what I do as an engineer, but I have an itch to be more than just an engineer. I want to be in fitness. I want to be a light in other people’s lives. I want to inspire health and wellness. I want to be active daily and lead by example. It means a ton to me and that is why I’m scared. Because I don’t want to mess it up.

So, if ever you feel that fear creeping up when you are pursuing something that is important to you, run towards it. And do it scared.

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